just fine

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Posts by just fine

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  40

  Here we go again. The next hate letter from our 2nd Son.

  by Still Totally ADD in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  yes it happen again with our youngest son.

  this last monday we got a letter from him telling us how unloving we are because we are no longer jw.

  cult and not had kids.

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  just fine

  I don't know if this will help, but when I left as an adult child, I finally had to tell my parents that I loved them no matter what. and i wanted them in my life, but they had to respect my choices as an adult. I assured them I would not attack their beliefs if they would respect mine. Then I left it alone until they were ready to have a relationship. It took some time for them to make peace with it, now we have a good relationship, but religion is never discussed.

  i have a better relationship with my parents than my siblings that are jw's, but it's because we have boundaries.

  Good luck. I hope you can find peace.
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  10

  Looking to Move in a few years?

  by Still Totally ADD in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  my wife and i are thinking about moving to central tn somewhere between crossville and cookeville.

  maybe even as far west to lebanon or as far east to hariman.

  things have changes so much for us in the last 6 months we would like to live were it is a little warmer with lots of wild herbs for my wife who is a herbalist and for me so i can garden more.

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  just fine

  That is what we want too. A little elbow room, but still close to shopping and doctors. Good luck!
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  10

  Looking to Move in a few years?

  by Still Totally ADD in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  my wife and i are thinking about moving to central tn somewhere between crossville and cookeville.

  maybe even as far west to lebanon or as far east to hariman.

  things have changes so much for us in the last 6 months we would like to live were it is a little warmer with lots of wild herbs for my wife who is a herbalist and for me so i can garden more.

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  just fine

  We are planning a move to TN as well - this is great information. Anyone know much about Tullahoma? We have visited the Nashville area and really liked Franklin too. We have also visited the Bristol area and Knoxville. Next up is the Chattanooga area.
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  21

  How Have You Changed Much In Attitude & Actions Since Leaving The Witnesses?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  it takes time to stop thinking or reacting like a jehovah's witness.. are you still judgmental?

  a know it all?

  a person that listens more with their heart instead of their head---like jehovah's witnesses ???.

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  just fine

  I am much more tolerant of myself and others. It took quite a awhile to get past judging everyone for everything. In a college class the professor talked about religions that shun as a form of discipline. He asked one of the Mormon's "if your god is great and powerful why does he need you to be hurtful and mean to other people? Can't he take care of it himself if he disagrees with what someone is doing?" That clicked for me, I don't have to save the world, I only have to save myself. Meaning - I make decisions for me that feel right, and everyone else is allowed to make decisions that feel right to them. Life is so much easier................
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  19

  shunning within the family.

  by bigmac in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm giving 3 examples of this practice--that i know of personally.. .

  my first wife--born in--divorced me over 30 years ago.

  she totally shuns our son--now 38--d/f'd and now happily married and enjoying life to the max.. my pioneer partner--from the mid 60's-----he totally shuns his daughter---to the point of even ignoring her in the street.. a close friend of mine--in the 60's and 70's-----i was best man at his wedding.

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  just fine

  I am running into this right now. I left many years ago and was never DF. But now a relative of mine is DF and I won't be a part of the shunning. This has infuriated my family members. I recently had a big blow up with my family because I told them that I choose love and shunning is not loving. I was told that because I refuse to shun the DF person I am "ruining" the lesson that DF'ing is supposed to teach. I haven't stepped foot in a KH in more than 15 years - so why on earth would I shun someone who left? The craziness never ends. The whole family has turned on this DF relative - and have done some terrible things in the name of this religion.

  On the up side our non-jw family and the community that they live in have seen for themselves the hateful and hurtful nature of this. The JW's have given their own anti-witness to alot of people.
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  23

  Are You Comfortable With Who You Now Are?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  many jws are misfits and many that were raised as jws find it difficult to be "normal".

  are you comfortable with yourself at this point in time?.

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  just fine

  Absolutely! I was raised in it and left more than 15 years ago. The first few years were a little rough, now life gets better and better. Freedom is a wonderful thing. Once i made peace with the decision I had made the rest was easy. Once you find your balance to the point no one can shake you from it, the witnesses have no control.
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  30

  How many of you haven't fared too well since your exit?

  by i_drank_the_wine in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i know that i've had a hard time piecing things back together after losing my wife and family a couple years ago and haven't really gotten the ball rolling to say the least.

  just curious to hear if anyone else is in the same boat, or was in the same boat and how long it took them to get a "new life" figured out and going..

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  just fine

  When I first left I was completely lost. I didn't know what to do with my new found freedom and I did party quite a bit that first year. Then I decided to join some other groups. I played volleyball on a league, joined a women's basketball team, played on the company softball team, volunteered at the animal shelter, and adopted a dog from the shelter. It all helped me to gain some balance and perspective. I went to college and got my degree. I have been out 13 years now and I'm in a good place. It'll happen........ just keep putting one foot in front of the other.
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  42

  Name Things That Are Unique To Jehovah's Witnesses

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  they are the only religion that i know of that disapprove of a college education.

  they alone believe in the significance of 1914. they exclusively believe that christ jesus is michael the archangel.....to name a few.. what can you add to the list?.

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  just fine

  They tear families apart in the name of Jehovah.

  Persons who disagree are labled crazy, demonized or both.
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  18

  Reaching a Significant Milestone

  by Quendi in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hello friends,.

  sunday, 4 september 2011 will go down as an important day in my spiritual journey.

  i had an extraordinary experience today that i feel compelled to share with all of you.

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  just fine

  I am glad you are finding acceptance and comfort. What a difference from what we all felt at the Hall.
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  22

  Another step in healing from the days as a JW

  by FlyingHighNow in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i am bringing this over from the "still no pants suits, for sisters" thread.. it's funny how i don't think much about healing from the jw's anymore.

  i was not raised a jw.

  i was only active for around 10 years.

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  just fine

  When I look back now I can't believe the incredible journey life has become. The fear and bitterness gradually replaced by peace and confidence that I was making good choices on my own. When I first left I was afraid of everything, Armadgeddon, other witnesses finding out about my sins, etc.

  Two things I learned that apply to witnesses and any other persons in your life "other people only have as much control over you as you allow, and other people will only treat you as poorly as you allow them to." With that I could take back control of my life, decisions, and everything else - I realised it was all up to me and I didn't have to allow the Witnesses any place in my life.